Sunday Morning Services

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Prelude to Services

Accompanying the Choir: Dr. Dre

A message to God.

Spiritual Family Sing Along

Special Guest singers: NAS

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reality Struck. Better Find Out Before your Time’s Out. What the Fuck?

Inspirational Weekly Message

The LACS - Drinks Up

 I’m losing my mind with folks that I’ve never seen! We all got one thing in common, we like to drink as a team.

Weekly Sermon

Steve Shives.

Collection of Offerings

Musical accompaniment:  The Roots

Great Moments in Church History

Benediction

This ain’t no upwardly mobile freeway.  This is the road to Hell.

Enjoy.

Flower Power

Flowers for sale at the store today:

Flowers for free at the stables:

Enjoy.

The Miracle of Medical Malpractice

Just when you thought you’d seen the worst of the religion inspired creationist freak shows, along comes a real life example of the extent to which religious idiocy has infected the minds of America.  The glow is fading off this old religious miracle, but fear not my fickle-brained faithful friends!!  There’s a new miracle ready to rock your world!!

It’s a Miracle?

(CNN) – Even in the Bible Belt, coroners don’t use the word “miracle” lightly.

But Holmes County, Mississippi, Coroner Dexter Howard has no qualms using the word for the resurrection, as it were, of Walter Williams, who he was declared dead Wednesday night.


As if to mock the
recent rebroadcast of my heavily documented on-line secular miracle, my old neighbors in Mississippi have seen fit to induce another miracle of their own in an obvious attempt to glam onto the press I’ve generated with mine.  Of course it’s rather self serving for this incompetent medical examiner to lay his own incompetence off as a miracle, but it’s a helluva good way to distract the bumble brained Baptists who apparently voted him into his position as coroner in the first place.

A Different Kind of Miracle

I suspect the ecclesiastical certificate of this miracle is already on it’s way back from the Kinko’s where Brother Ted gets a 10% bulk-rate discount.  I hope my religious friends won’t take too much offense to me using such a desultory eight letter word, but perhaps if we examine the actual evidence, there is a more rational explanation for what happened than “godditit”.  Let’s hit the breaks on the Baptist Pope-mobile for just a second here and look at the “observational” science as Ken Ham suggests is the only proper way to decide on these serious issues of life and death.

By Creationist Standards

Because I was taking really good notes the night Ken Ham gave that science lesson to Bill Nye, I decided to look at the ‘observational” evidence of this latest claim of a Mississippi miracle and here’s what I found:

“Among the public health consequences was a medico-legal spoils system that valued pseudoscience and expedient criminal convictions over scientific validity”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/17/steven-hayne_n_3454666.html

The state is one of several that elect county coroners to oversee death investigations. The office requires no medical training, only a high-school diploma, and it commonly goes to the owner of the local funeral home.

http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/jurisprudence/2008/02/the_bitemarks_men.html

Mississippi Needs a Miracle

It would be more of a miracle if Mississippi decided to implement standards for medical examiners that included, I don’t know, maybe having some medical license or training?   Until then, Uncle Teds Bible College and Taxidermy graduates are free to fill the role. Heaven forbid they’d think to pass a law requiring doctors to check on the aging batteries of poor old Black folks with failing pacemakers.  You gotta give them credit.  This kind of thing isn’t out of the norm for religious folks. The reason they’re so quick to pronounce the living as dead is because they are gullible enough to believe that the dead go on living.

Enjoy.

Evolutionary Example

Sentient Plants

There’s no doubt in my mind that evolution is a fact.  There’s no other way to explain how I  got cat whisker genes translocated into my ears.  Every now and then I’ll notice an errant hair growing out of my ear that is so long and thick it brushes against the wall as I walk down the hall.  It’s a throwback for most humans.  One of those things like your appendix.  Totally vestigial in most of us, but still useful to some in the south as a means of alerting them when they are about to stick their heads into a rabbit hole of insufficient diameter.

Enjoy.

Torturing Toddlers Testicles

As we approach the 2014 election season, never forget the blood-lust of the Republican party cheering on President Bush the Torturer while watching him commit the most heinous acts of brutality against humanity in the history of America. All on the basis of “legal” advice from this one guy - John Yoo.

Illegal Advice

I was absolutely shocked when I first heard the exchange, and you don’t have to read too far between the lines to wonder where the question of torturing children’s testicles came from in the first place.  It’s not the kind of question that gets randomly tossed out.  It’s yet another piece of ‘missing history’.

Prove It or Lose It

If there is a truly moral Christian soldier among the whole lot of you otherwise worthless religious wankers, I’d sure like to see it put to a better use than public praying time after the Church pot luck social.

To all the God slobbering, Jeebus’ loving, creationist-leaning, lunatic fringe Christians out there:

I once heard a song about how much Jeebus loved the children, all the children of the world.  Red and Yellow.  Black and White.  They were precious in his sight.

Looking for a Miracle?

If that’s still true, then how about taking time out of your busy schedules of homosexual hating and helping do what you know Jeebus would want you to do for the children?  Speak out forcefully from your pulpits for justice to be served!   I don’t think Jeebus would have approved of slicing up little Iraqi kids testicles with razors to make their daddy “confess” to the whereabouts of Bush’s fantasy weapons.  There’s no stature of limitations on war crimes.

Enjoy.