The Miracle of Medical Malpractice

Just when you thought you’d seen the worst of the religion inspired creationist freak shows, along comes a real life example of the extent to which religious idiocy has infected the minds of America.  The glow is fading off this old religious miracle, but fear not my fickle-brained faithful friends!!  There’s a new miracle ready to rock your world!!

It’s a Miracle?

(CNN) — Even in the Bible Belt, coroners don’t use the word “miracle” lightly.

But Holmes County, Mississippi, Coroner Dexter Howard has no qualms using the word for the resurrection, as it were, of Walter Williams, who he was declared dead Wednesday night.


As if to mock the
recent rebroadcast of my heavily documented on-line secular miracle, my old neighbors in Mississippi have seen fit to induce another miracle of their own in an obvious attempt to glam onto the press I’ve generated with mine.  Of course it’s rather self serving for this incompetent medical examiner to lay his own incompetence off as a miracle, but it’s a helluva good way to distract the bumble brained Baptists who apparently voted him into his position as coroner in the first place.

A Different Kind of Miracle

I suspect the ecclesiastical certificate of this miracle is already on it’s way back from the Kinko’s where Brother Ted gets a 10% bulk-rate discount.  I hope my religious friends won’t take too much offense to me using such a desultory eight letter word, but perhaps if we examine the actual evidence, there is a more rational explanation for what happened than “godditit”.  Let’s hit the breaks on the Baptist Pope-mobile for just a second here and look at the “observational” science as Ken Ham suggests is the only proper way to decide on these serious issues of life and death.

By Creationist Standards

Because I was taking really good notes the night Ken Ham gave that science lesson to Bill Nye, I decided to look at the ‘observational” evidence of this latest claim of a Mississippi miracle and here’s what I found:

“Among the public health consequences was a medico-legal spoils system that valued pseudoscience and expedient criminal convictions over scientific validity”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/17/steven-hayne_n_3454666.html

The state is one of several that elect county coroners to oversee death investigations. The office requires no medical training, only a high-school diploma, and it commonly goes to the owner of the local funeral home.

http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/jurisprudence/2008/02/the_bitemarks_men.html

Mississippi Needs a Miracle

It would be more of a miracle if Mississippi decided to implement standards for medical examiners that included, I don’t know, maybe having some medical license or training?   Until then, Uncle Teds Bible College and Taxidermy graduates are free to fill the role. Heaven forbid they’d think to pass a law requiring doctors to check on the aging batteries of poor old Black folks with failing pacemakers.  You gotta give them credit.  This kind of thing isn’t out of the norm for religious folks. The reason they’re so quick to pronounce the living as dead is because they are gullible enough to believe that the dead go on living.

Enjoy.

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Sunday Morning Services

666th post on The Tim Channel.  Just sayin’.

Good Morning all.

Shortest Church Service in history.

Pray Away

Just one song for today.

Adele

Past Services

Enjoy.

Sunday Morning Services

Good morning everyone!  Today we are giving thanks for the arrival of the new iOS7 Apple operating system, due to be released into the wild on September 18th. I know it’ll be a breath of fresh AirDrop for me.  Moment of silence for the late Steve Jobs please.  Party on.

Prelude to Services

Accompanying the Choir – The Verve

The Verve Continue reading

Sunday Morning Services

Good morning to all my miscreant atheist friends!  Special blessings to those of you returning after having been here for our initial Sunday morning service last week!

As always, today’s sermon will focus on answering some of life’s most perplexing questions.

Who are these children who scheme and run wild and why do you tremble each time they ride by?

Prelude to Services

Guest Organist Harmonica: Ozark Mountain Daredevils

Ozark Mountain Daredevils - It'll Shine When it ShinesLike my mama said, you only live ’til you’re dead. Continue reading

Blaming Xenu

Despite creationist protestations to the contrary , I understand that I can’t “prove” that Jeebus “speaks” to me with any kind of scientific rigor, (at least not the kind that actual scientists “believe in“).

In the hazy shadows provided by the dictates of “non overlapping magisteria“, Jeebus has every right to reach out to anybody he wants and to tag any old reprobate as his messenger, making me as logical a choice as anybody, now that Hitch is dead.

The message Jeebus seems to be beaming to me lately is, like the visions of TV show psychics and spiritualists, a tad lacking in specifics.  If you don’t keep that foremost in your mind, you could end up as crazy as a teenage kid bent on digging around a forest for mysterious Golden Plates.

It is undoubtedly just part of Jeebusmysterious ways that the messages people get from him are so often mixed and garbled.  With all those caveats in mind, the BEST I can sort out of Jeebus’ message to me, because of background chatter from the Xenu Inter-Galactic Network, is this:

Whenever anybody “likes”, “retweets”, “follows”, “favorites” or “subscribes” to any of my web posts, Jeebus bends down and pats his dog on the head, baby bunnies smile, and at least one old man gets a tingle in his nether regions.

So it is written. So it shall be done.

Enjoy.