Political Playtime

I figured I would take a short break from my hectic schedule of trying to rebuild my life from scratch to do a little political blogging.  We’re on the cusp of a Presidential election cycle and there’s a ton of stuff going on that needs sorting out.  So let’s get to sorting.

Sy Hersh

I believe him.  What he says makes perfect sense in context with what went down and the fact that the ‘mainstream’ media is piling on Hersh just adds more credibility to what he’s saying.  I can’t remember the last time mainstream media got anything right on issues of the Middle East since at least the New York Times Judith Miller reach-around.  It’s not like he’s saying anything that doesn’t fit exactly within the pattern of a longstanding pattern of Osama Bin Laden protectionism.  You can just see the Saudi’s tossing bundles of money at Pakistan to keep him under wraps and protected.  The only part I’m curious about at all is whether or not we knew he was there all along and Obama finally agreed to payoff whoever needed to be paid off to let us fly in there and take him out.

Invasion of Texas

The sooner the better IMHO. That said, isn’t it now patently obvious that the state which gave us George Bush is about as dedicated to supporting the military of this country as Jeb Bush is to being an honest politician?  The speed at which these numbskulls can go from flag waving patriots to secessionist blowhards is mind numbing.  Expect an “army” of mobility-assisted Medicare seniors to attempt to recreate a scene from Red Dawn in a couple of months when the US military goes to Texas for training.  You’ll want to stock up on gold and seed stock.  Argh.  Go Wolverines!

Bernie Sanders

He’s been saying the same thing for years.  Doesn’t change his position from week to week or news cycle to news cycle.  The people’s candidate.  Don’t let anyone tell you he can’t be elected.  We elected an unknown Black guy president and then re-elected him.  Bernie Sanders is a shoo-in.  I wonder if Hillary would be interested in the vice-presidency?   Go Bernie!

Black People

Black people are pissed.  If you were Black you’d be pissed too.  How about reigning in the out of control police state and prison industrial complex and give our minority citizens a break?  And don’t tell me how slavery ended hundreds of years ago or that Black folks aren’t being continuously harassed and discriminated daily.  Now they’re being accused of turning the country atheist.  If it’s true I’m glad for their support but O’Reilly is just trying to tar and feather the Black folks with everything he envisions as evil.  The country would be a helluva lot better off if Black folks actually were turning to secularism instead of wasting their time and money supporting fake ass preachers looking to buy fifty million dollar Lear Jets.

Jeb Bush

Iraq.  Does he or doesn’t he?  Only his pollster knows for sure.  What kind of mental midget with the last name of Bush is going to think he has a snowball’s chance in Hell of winning the presidency?  Only one whose last name is Bush.   FFS.  There must be a fund raising bonanza or a tax break involved for him to put himself through this much humiliation.

Enjoy.

 

 

 

On Faith

Debating God Slobberers

Long before they go cosmological or ontological on you, there’s this bit of pablum you have to wade through with almost all of your run-of-the-mill God slobberers.   Here’s the short list of the debating tactics of those on the religious short bus and how to deal with them:

The Gob Slobberer Starter Toolkit

1. You are mad at/hate God.
2. You wish to masturbate (more enthusiastically?) without oversight. (Masturbation just manages to squeeze out “practice homosexuality” as the ‘go-to sin” above the Mason-Dixon line).
3. You are lashing out at “the church” because (e.g.) a priest masturbated you a little too enthusiastically or you had some other negative experience at church.
4. You haven’t looked for God in the right places.

The Skeptics Responses

1.  I wish there was a God to be mad at but since that’s s a fantasy of yours I don’t share I’m going to have to hold you personally responsible for all the chowder-headed nonsense you’re spewing and the damage that occurs as a result.

2.  I do the best I can not to embarrass the ghost of Oscar Wilde.

3.  The soft hand of a Catholic priest would have been a Godsend in lieu of the total subjugation of my mind which was attempted in order to help me find comfort in the patently ridiculous notions being promulgated by mindless goobers like you.

4.  I looked everywhere for God as a child, but it was all to no avail. Were the father, son and holy ghost all too busy for for my toast?   Upon puberty it finally hit me.  Vaginas seemed the likeliest hideout for God that I hadn’t already searched in my youth.  Checked a bunch….nada God there..

I’ll keep looking to broaden the sample size but I’m skeptical I’ll find anything other than an echo in even the largest of vaginas.

Maybe God is too ashamed to show his face after looking around and seeing what a horrible job he did in the first place.  That’s a distinct possibility and the one I’d run up the flagpole if I was a master goober in religious apologetics.

Enjoy.

Listicles

The trend to put everything in a click-bait listicle has led to the invention of the word itself.

Would it be too much to ask for a listicle of the doctors who scientifically decided exactly how hard we could physically abuse prisoners-of-war?

Did they strap an iPhone onto the prisoners and capture the data on a “health and fitness” app as they bounced them off the walls?

I dunno, but it seems kinda ‘war crime’ish” to me and I want to avoid those doctors who engaged in this type of medicine in any case.  Who has the list? Is it left for me to come up with a listicle of listicles that have been overlooked for far too long?

Enjoy.

Noah and the Dinosaurs Part One

The Religious Science division here at The Tim Channel, along with the assistance of the Non Overlapping Magisteria Department at Brigham Young University, has been hard at work trying to parse out the more difficult missing details of the young Earth creation ‘theory’ recently seen popularized in a debate between Ken Ham and Bill Nye.

Unspecified Miscreant Update

I’m not saying I’m gangsta’ but it takes some doing to get banned from a FAKE casino without even trying.  Zynga Poker.  To wit:

I can’t even imagine any terms of service I could have broached in the 85000+ hands I’ve played there over the last several years, but the overall experience was mixed at best, so it’s no great loss.

I’d like to give you some insight into Zynga’s abrupt ejaculation but dam if I’m gonna go digging through their customer service nightmare to help them FIX their service.  The reasons for them buggering me are UNSPECIFIED, which basically means I’ve managed to do something so horrific they don’t even have a regular category to fit it into!

You better watch me folks because I’m (allegedly) a thoroughly dangerous man.  Zynga is most likely in the process right now of passing my Gravatar icon around to all the other casinos.  I’ll be lucky if I can gain entry to a Vegas strip lounge by the time they finish with their electronic character assassination!

Still, just when you think they might be getting most of the bugs worked out of their system you see that’s a pipe dream.  Just remember kids.  If Zynga can do this to me with no notice you might want to think twice (or three times) before investing in that new tablet version of their Farmville offering.  You might get up one morning to feed your cattle and find that Zynga has rustled them all and sent them to the slaughterhouse!!

I’ve removed everything Zynga from all my devices and suspended their access to my Facebook. They have shown they do not have the social media savvy to discern friend from foe so I will also have to assume they lack the technical ability to safely protect my account information as well.

Enjoy.