Sure Got Quiet

 Family Matters

If Everyone Was Listening

On Family Matters

After a barrage of bullshit out of my nieces back in Fort Dodge yesterday, aimed directly at my supposed shortcomings, I took affirmative action to reduce the background noise.  It appears that the strategy has been successful and I may now resume my normal political, dog and life blogging.  In other words, it’s back to sex, drugs and rock n’roll, or at least as much of each as a rocker my age can muster.  Maybe my ‘family’ figured out by now that the things they think they can use to undermine my “authoritah’ and “embarrass” me are exactly those things which I have already blogged about?  I dunno? Since they complain I haven’t visited them enough over the years while totally overlooking that they have NEVER visited me it’s hard to figure. The clueless self delusion of my family is now the stuff of legend.   I’m half hoping they’ll be foolish enough to continue their idiocracy because my web stats are going through the roof!  Dawn’s mangling of English alone is comedy GOLD.

Yes certain things were shared pre Tim in America, but your dilutions in your mind make them worse than they are. I’m done doing laundry on here, I have FAMILY to attend to that’s far more important than how u feel or were treated. Enjoy the last of the money u have left, lololol  (Do you even have enough money to be able to feed and care for your recently adopted dog Molly??  Not according to your mom!  You won’t find any happiness waiting for me to go broke sweetie.  Dam, that’s gotta sting!)

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Rita’s Last Letter to “Mom”

When Rita found out her chemotherapy at the Hemer Lung Clinic was not as effective as she had hoped, she walked away from the treatments (against doctors advice) and she opted  to take a more ‘natural’ approach to her death than that which the medical profession would have preferred.

Enough Already!

Giving Up on Radiation and Chemotherapy

It was at that point that I started working on her rationalist eulogy and she started working on her last letter to her mom.  When she finished writing it, she gave it to me with the following caveat:

“If my mom treats you with dignity and respect upon my death just hand her this letter and walk away.  If she treats you like a criminal and disrespects both my wishes and your dignity, then do whatever you can to make sure that EVERYBODY sees this letter.”

The full letter is available for public viewing at the bottom of this post.  The following is some expository information I have added as ‘bonus’ material.

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Final Farewell to Fort Dodge

Although it had been my intention to regain residence in the state of Iowa and live in the city from which I graduated high school (with honors) back in 1976, the cards were stacked heavily against me. Due to the fact that I have been living in Germany for over five years, my US driver’s license was expired and of no use.  Add to that the serendipitous ‘luck’ of escaping my Nazi (no hyperbole) mother-in-law in Germany on the LAST day before my passport expired and you have the stuff of Kafkaesque nightmares. This led to a situation where I arrived into the state of Iowa with absolutely NO current ID. I imagine the Iowa DMV is overwhelmed with fake passports that are two days past expiration, such is the ease of duplicating the document.  After all, who doesn’t know at least half a dozen folks running around Iowa trying to pass themselves off as somebody else using a “potentially” forged passport just slightly out of expiration?  It’s likely just as common as tits on a pumpkin.

“Welcoming” Platitudes Were as Abundant on the numbered waiting slip at the DMV as they were about the house at my sister’s place of residence.

There were many attempts to rectify this less than fortuitous situation.  More than one of my friends back home got a front row seat to the ridiculousness as well as my personal angst and disgust which I was unable to suppress while getting involved in trying to help me solve this dilemma.

It turns out that the only quick resolution to my ‘illegal alien’ status is a trip to the New Orleans passport office, the ONLY place in the USA where this can be handled in a timely fashion:

Updated and edited to add: ONLY IF YOU HAVE A TICKET LEAVING THE US IN THE NEXT TEN DAYS, a little something I had forgotten about and which added another degree of difficulty to my life a short while down the road.

Me and my trusty companion Bandit are off to the gulf coast for the purpose of proving that I am not a foreign terrorist or Mexican immigrant.  With my passport in hand I will be able to regain some semblance of a normal life in the US (bank account, driver’s license, job….).  I’m glad to have found a quick course to the resolution of my troubles and a return to a normal life in the US, even as I’m painfully aware that there may never be a return to ‘normalcy’ for the ‘family’ I left behind in Iowa.

It’s a sad situation when the Iowa Department of Motor vehicles isn’t even allowed to check the Fort Dodge Senior High 1976 yearbook or accept the dozens of signed affidavits on my identity that I’m sure I could have collected from my many friends there in the city in order to ‘prove’ my identity, but we must remain HYPER vigilant against the communist ..err…Muslim threat.

I would have liked to open a business (or two or three) in Fort Dodge and maybe even paying some heavy taxes to help rebuild the blighted areas, but such is life.  I doubt I’ll ever move back to Iowa after the fiasco I endured, unless I get a penchant for frostbite or pick up a really heavy methamphetamine habit.

Enjoy.

Best of Dodge

Today’s Top Retailer – Homespun Collection

Homespun Collection

The Past

It’s been almost forty years since I graduated FDSH (Class of ’76).  In between then and now, I have had an exciting and prosperous life.  The last five years I’ve been in Germany running a business teaching English to eager Germans with my loving and lovely wife Rita.

My Lovely Wife

Sadly, Rita passed away in September of this year after a losing bout with cancer and I found myself a widower in a foreign land.  To be honest, I’m more than a little homesick and a lot heartbroken, so I’ve returned to the land of my youth (and family) to reclaim my spot in the land of milk and honey.  I stepped away from our business and returned to the US with little more than a few suitcases and my faithful dog Bandit to begin life anew once again.

Band and Four Bags

I’m optimistic that my enthusiasm for life, my education, and my broad life experiences will see me thru to another successful chapter in my life.  Many of my former high school classmates have already departed this Earthly plane just as my lovely wife recently did so I’m also keenly aware that it’s likely to be my final chapter.  As tragic a consequence as it is to lose my best friend and business partner of twenty five years, I cannot roll over and give into the grief that would consume me if I stopped moving forward and mired myself in the pain of her loss.  I would not honor her wishes or my future by doing so.

The Present

Sears

Fort Dodge seems to be in a state of flux, having lost a huge number of jobs on the closure of the packing industry back in the 80’s. As I view my old stomping grounds with aging, yet fresh eyes, it seems to me that it’s long past time for Fort Dodge to regain the economic viability I remember from my youth. As long as I am part of this community,  I shall attempt to promote those businesses that mirror the high standards of customer service that I have always brought to my clients/customers over the decades.  Even as Sears goes the way of the dinosaurs, I am proud to see that there are still quite a few remaining successful businesses here that hold to those standards.  Each day over the course of the next several days I shall highlight local businesses in my BEST OF DODGE series that showed me the same level of commitment to customer service and merchandising that we brought to our business.  A rising tide raises all ships and as long as I’m anchored here I will do my best to see the tide rise one again.  Today’s endorsement after the jump.

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Sunday Morning Services

Good morning to all.  This is the first service from America since returning from my socialist utopia in Europe.  As such, I’m highlight a song this Sunday that I ran across right before leaving Germany.  It was part of a Philliips Ambilight commercial I saw and what caught my attention was the part about not talking the easy road.  Why do you suppose that struck a chord with me?  LOL.

My Silver LIning

I hear a voice calling
Calling out for me
These shackles I’ve made in an attempt to be free
Be it for reason, be it for love
I won’t take the easy road

Prelude to Services

See all of you soon at the top of the stairs!

Top of the Stairs

At the top of the stairs they got keys to Cadillacs, BMW’s Mercedes Benz’s and all of that.

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