Jesus in Your Buttcrack

A church seat cushion is spotted sporting”the face of Jesus“, though to be honest I, see Jimmy Durante or possibly Bozo the Clown as better candidates.

“This is not a miracle, it’s a sign of God,” said parish priest Daniel Gavard.

That’s the conclusion of the foremost authority on the scene.  While this ’sighting’ appears totally ludicrous to most rational beings, there are ’signs’ that it is indeed a work of divinity:

Reunion Bishop Gilbert Aubry has so far not commented on the occurrence which came within days of outbursts of violence over the high cost of living on the island whose economy depends on tourism and subsidies from the French state.

This is an outrageous example of religious naivety, but it does help to explain why my underwear was always getting jammed up the crack of my ass when I sat through church services.

*Originally posted back in 2009 on a domain I abandoned.  Thanks to waybackmachine.org for making it possible to retrieve these fading tidbits of thetimchannel’s blog history.

Enjoy.